PESACH!

First time making pesach!! Wow
Busy and fun :)
If you have never seen Yerushalayim erev-pesach....
You aint seen pesach yet!
On channukah its the menorah's and sufganiyot in every random makolet
Sukkos time you hear nail-banging at ever hour
Pesach you hear vacuming!
Every hardware store and anything store sells gas burners, toaster ovens, pots and peelers! Brooms, sponges, sink inserts and shelf-paper!
( 'Bedatz' shelf paper of course)
The gas station- 50 shekel to vacuum inside my tiny car!!
Helloooo?!
And
Let's not forget the supermarkets..
Um there were people in the rain waiting outside the store an hour before it opened!
You think the pushing on buses is bad.. try Israeli pesach shopping- its like bumper cars- without the padding- and bumper car traffic jams down every aisle!!
Help! All I want is a box or two of matzah and some pesach cereal!
Well, we managed.. with the beatles playing on your ipod- anything is possible
I guess all you need really is love
:)

Please Note-
Public Hagolas Keilim and Mechiras Chometz will take place IY"H sunday between 10:00 and 12:00 outside every shul and shtiebel.
(All pots must be clean and not a Ben Yoma bevakasha)
Now all we're waiting for is the mass chometz burnings! The say it puts Lag Ba'omer to shame!
Chag Kosher V'Samaech
Enjoy!

Flight

the
thunder
red and black and dark
heard but not seen
incoherent for its volume
wordless
loud
unstoppable
so
stay out of its path
it is rolling ceaselessly forward

every red and furious encounter
leaves the butterfly
singed scarred
there is no fighting
there is only hiding
but the red thunder will seek the butterfly out
it must blend
pretend

the butterfly's flight
doesn't exist
a flight that would be
so different
slow, beautiful
painful
all seen little heard
every inch of movement drawing all its energy
grace power ingenuity
but it wont fly
can't fly
the butterfly is trapped
hovering
trying to live
its feet never touch ground
it flutters in fear
exhaustion...

the butterfly watches with eyes
too big too revealing
but cannot be
like the wind
up and down in and around
soft and coaxing
or the whistling sound
that it watches warily
lilting laughing carefree..

so it hides
masquerade in place
it is alive
but inside
the butterfly is a moth
grey, lifeless
that withers
and disappears
at the lightest touch

it is a death unknown
unwitnessed

till one day
a ray of light appears
new
never seen before
never imagined
penetrating its shroud
so simply
deeply
the frail butterfly shakes
the light is strong and lovely
warm, kind
but it hurts
to face it...

drawing out
a beating heart
the beauty
magnificence
that the butterfly has had to hide
but
so slowly
it begins
awaken
feel talk laugh sing
be fly
open
free

fighting to shed the remnants
of her cloak
and build the little moth
from the inside
the butterfly cannot look back

the butterfly is new
a new creation
begins to live
to love
connect
share
no longer afraid
a learner and a teacher
a partner

ray of light and butterfly
cannot be apart
without the light, she cannot fly
and the ray of light
follows
to new places
it never knew it never knew
attached
in flight
in love
enclosed in a secret
together



see
see the
unrecognisable butterfly
in a new orbit
a bright one
fearless

brave
discovering
meaning of flight

It's easier and funner than it looks

yO sUsHi !

yoU hAve tO TrY It SoMeTImE

The I

fear
dark dark fear
gripping steel hand of anxiety
rooted so deeply in my heart
that old familiar place
that i'd rather not visit

but

i am alone
so i will be alone
this lonely view
i share with no-one
complete solitary being

my mind darts like a trapped bird
looking for someone someone
the voice says
there is no-one
only you
so be alone
alone i am

and now
things are so different
unrecognizably so
although not from your unchanging view
but i
i am i
my heart and the voices in my head
are yours no longer
i learned
pain sadness
loneliness faithlessness
sears your heart but wont kill you
if it hasn't got you yet
i learned
fight
hard
but
shhhhh..
quietly
and alone

and so i do
far away from anything familiar to you

almost comical but not
when i contemplate
how little your window is

you have never seen me
my death my salvation
us
the years
our life
our love
our laughter
our secret

to worry you
to pain you
is never my intention
nothing i do
is intended for you
anymore
i am me
i live for myself
act for myself
alone
freed

don't you see
i don't forget
you are there
and
i never ask for anything
if i wanted your help
if i thought it could exist
i'd ask

alone always and to die alone
help who you can
and be who you are
and live for no-one
if you live
let it be for yourself
alone

Purim

The table- red and royal. Extravagant. The menu- perfectly beautiful, delicious, yet practical (most guests will be too drunk to appreciate anything complex)

Mishloach Manos- inexpensive yet tasteful...

My family all made up sweet and lovely..

My child, so delighted with the pantomime, the perfect dream-like fantasy of today

Watch his face, his eyes when he takes it all in

The colours, the children, the streets of Yeruhalayim are so bright

Feel the goodness, the giving..

Put smiles on people's faces..

Can you?

Use all your energy- physical, emotional- your creativity, to create a day so joyous and free

Can you relax, let go, invite them all in, and sit and watch and enjoy

Discover the beauty of truth in release, inhibitions dissolved, appearances set aside

Be brave, be yourself. Fell full, feel free, feel confident to enjoy...

Can you relinquish all expectation, and simply welcome all that happens today

A mitzvah of feasting, celebrating, partying. A holiday steeped in mystery- and revelation.

A holiday so suited to today.

Dark, disconnected days- but we know its meaning is simple hidden

For now

Purim has always been my favourite..

When I finally feel peace, harmony, symmetry

In the seeming chaos, and lack of order.

From the past, to the future

Just one day

Fall into it

Let go

Experience it fully

Enjoy

:)

Close My Eyes

How do I get here every single morning

When my eyes burn so

My head so cloudy

Eyelids close won't open

I lay n bed

Warm

Shut shut the light

The world

Every

One

Shut my sore eyes and don't come back

Plug me in to the music

Please

Give me a week

To be still and dark

The waves in my heart too endless

The lists in my head too endless

Heavy

Aching

Sit

Hear the rain

Music metal and loud

Just sitPlease don't drag me out of here

Let me sit awhile....

Just

So I can breathe

So I don't break....

Into millions of pieces

Norm

I found this picture online- it's round the corner from my house!

My car! My little beat-up white car, I love so dearly.

Me and you through thick and thin.

From way back when I was a passenger... then there was my first trip home with my new baby... I remember how you were patient when I became a new driver- and we became firmly attached. And even more patient when I became an educated driver (chutzpah is a must in Jerusalem) - and then a pregnant driver!

You've really been there for us. Taken us all the way to the Chermon, to Eilat, Caesaria, Ashkelon.... Remember when the clutch gave... but we still made it back on the Tel-Aviv highway at 20km\hour?!

And those day when you were so loud, noisy and smelly, I was embarrassed to be seen with you. And your wonderful quirks and dents- darling front door that is NOT allowed to be locked. Period..... if you ever want to get in through the driver's seat again.

All those stressful parking moments and parking tickets (must be around 57 by now)

Remember when we got you a radio! What a joy! Then a cd connector. And when the discman and all my discs were stolen- an iPod connector.. Glory Be!

Well

I prayed for your speedy recovery- it's so good to have you back! Stay with me- I CANNOT be without you!

You have made my Jerusalem life the chill that it is..

And so today- reunited, we cruised along. Sunshine lighting up the city so vividly.

I drive by the tourists, you can spot them a mile away. And I wonder if they know this place.

The way I do.

To live in the ebb and flow of Jerusalem.

How it's not a vacation, a ten-day trip. Or even a one-year experience. Hotels, taxis, Kotel, Dead Sea and Cafe Rimon... Michal Negrin, maybe Emek Refa'im... That must be some other reality...

But this...

When you know the bank security guard. The parking lot security guard- which saves me getting out of the car to open the trunk so they can check (for bombs?!) The cashiers in the supermarket. The gas attendants. The mechanic. The butcher. The quaintest, most adorable coffee spots, and cocktail spots. The (best and fairest) fruit-sellers in Machane Yehuda. The Newspaper-man. Which tiny arbitrary store sells the freshest "loosies" cigarettes. The beggars who frequent this or that particular corner. The traffis lights that you'll never make and the ones you MUST. The meter maids (try make friends to fend off that 58th ticket!) And the real vacation spots where the tourists won't find you.

The glory of the city that's in its every detail.

We breathe this city's air, we know it's every mood..

It's not always particularly inspirational or spiritual..

But it's landscape marks journeys

Journeys of millions, over thousands of years

It's the city that holds my memories, my journeys

Jerusalem, maybe after all these years

You finally are

My home