When I Wake Up

Don't want to fall asleep because
I don't want to wake up
Here
This mad quiet scene
My world
I wish to wake up somewhere else
Like a child wishes upon a star
I am tired of this life
It's in's and out's running endlessly through my mind
Stop just stop
Wake me on a summer morning
In a steamy tent in India
In a gorgeous Tuscany villa
Perfect Japanese bedroom
Burned out on an old crack-den couch

Smell of cigarette smoke thick in the air
Wake me in a warm strange man's bed
White and navy beach-side house
Beautiful wooden home on a lake
Somewhere else
Not to my own winter flannel sheets
Not to this city's rain
But to another's
Not to my child's wet bed and soiled pajamas
Not to my man's sleeping face
My house, my kitchen, my endless laundry
Not to my life..please..
The tangible joy and pain I feel
Looking into the face of my child
My swollen belly
My new son letting me know his presence
My husband's concerned eyes
My heart
My constantly beating heart...

Don't want to wake up